The first ‘Word’. It is all that matters. When you greet someone, it’s a cake walk with “Hey”. The dilemma engulfs after you introduce yourself to the person you feel for. This is when a set of few words substantiate what you feel.
Either you tremble in fear or you are confident enough to make it work at the first stroke of approach. The place where you meet your love certainly makes a lot of difference. Workplace, college institution, museum, bar, public transport, park or just randomly on the streets. You would always feel the pressure of approach.
If you ask me individually, the place matters. The approach is based on the environment you meet, the kind of people you have around you and in what mental state you are in.
Eg: You would not be able to ask the person “Don’t you just hate it when people use pick-up lines on you?” (Pina, 2018) while you are in a place of worship.
With my experience, I had always preferred getting to know the person right from where scratch. This acts as the foundation where you would like your dreams to be formed.
Imagine a guy knowing a girl from college, meeting up coincidentally on a college project and trying to hit it off. How would that work? A sense of imagination where pieces of puzzle would just connect automatically, but it never does. A sensation of having something in common which gives you the edge to talk first; seems far-fetched.
However, common things would certainly give you the foundation to build something but in a limited time space.
The key here would be observation. Get to know the person well first, their likes and dislikes. Understand how their methodology to things would be, what would their way of being decisive be about? It’s not that you would never get second chances but it’s about you not being able to get this kind of an opportunity, very often.
Here the common ground would be helping each other out in researching the topic you are trying to create your project on. Delegating work that you feel the other person would be good at doing and following the same for yourself. Your common ground would then be knowing where you both best fit with each other. Was it the research, was it the problems you tackled, was it how you convinced others of your viewpoint? Somewhere between all this chaos, observing your equilibrium is where you would know where to keep your foot first.
You would then just follow with getting to know their favorite food. With no doubt, they would be different but maybe you can make something of your own just to quench their hunger and simultaneously portray your skills. This works often. A small gesture that goes a long way makes a huge difference at the beginning of any relationship.
When you are extremely comfortable after laying the initial groundwork, you would then get into being a little personal by knowing the person’s background and what they have been through. Could be struggles, life choices, education background, experiences etc. Most of your picture would be cleared when you share these together. If it could be done personally, even better. If not, between a trusted group circle, would do no harm.
Long walks to drop your ‘friend’ to their place would really be the most memorable and adorable thing you could be doing. It would then lead to a lot of information sharing that you could not have imagined happening over those months. It’s just the two of you. The more comfortable you are, the more private things you could share with one another.
These would then lead to lunch’s and dinners. If you haven’t hit it off or created an impression until then; the ball is not in your court.
So, you see it’s all about how you would get to know the one you would like to be friends with, spend your life or even just have a casual relationship. How you approach matters a lot, venue, background, culture is only an hinderance when you make it one.
The secret is to approach as a being. Just by knowing someone from long wouldn’t mean your work here is done. Its more towards how you keep the ‘talk’ active. How much you embrace the diversity of each other and respect the kind of individuality you have.
Scenario’s:
1. Don’t be judgmental, many things would be different from your lifestyle. Just listen to them, if you feel you can be comfortable, better. if not, just walk away.
2.Never think too much, if you feel confident enough to talk to a girl/guy with a genuine proposition, go ahead and talk to them.
Reference:
Pina, C. (2018, October 10). 17 clever pickup lines to try at a bar that are pitcher perfect. Elite Daily. https://www.elitedaily.com/p/17-clever-pickup-lines-to-try-at-a-bar-for-when-hey-feels-too-simple-12197966
